The M&M Story

Not long ago, I attended a memorial service for a great man I once knew in college.  His wife, also a dear friend from college, and I had been communicating the last weeks before his passing. One of the things I encouraged her to do was to plan his memorial service as a family. This was something we did with Brian and is one of the sweetest moments I remember from his last days with us on Earth. Surrounded by his closest friends, it was a little bit like: "let's plan a party for you, but we know you won't be there because you'll already be with Jesus." The thing about memorial services is that they are sad. People grieve. Everyone cries. It is the jarring reality that his life is now over and we won't see him again for the rest of earthly journey. Ever. But, it is also a celebration and an opportunity to reflect on the power of the cross. It is a sobering moment to remember we are not in control. We are mortal and fallible and dust. And a sobering moment t

Food is a big deal in our house. When my peeps were little and I was all on my own, I swore I would not feed them Mac-n-Cheese nor Chicken Nuggets every night. Yes, that was mostly motivated by pride, but still, I wanted them to have as much a normal life with one parent as I could provide. If Brian had been around, we would not be having Mac-n-Cheese nor Chicken Nuggets every night, so I was going to try my best to be more creative.  I mean, sometimes it was insane---trying to keep the peace between two toddlers, while trying to prepare something remotely nutritious, while trying not to make the biggest mess (knowing it was me to do the dishes later), while trying to not be bitter and mad and all about me that I was doing this alone.  Good thing God is in the business of being present in our lives. He was quite helpful on many occasions. All three of us made it through those first years eating broccoli, salad, pasta, frittatas, even lentils. To this day, my heart leaps when I get a re

This is something different for me. I'm not really sure I've ever written about parenting, but....I had some thoughts and, well, here they are. I have followed and read Howard Gardner's work since the early days of my teaching and parenting career.   Gardner is best known for his research and work with the multiple intelligences , a philosophy of thought that has come into mainstream education, most especially with the explosion of tech tools.   As a parent, I've often reflected on my learned (and practiced) teaching philosophies and attempted to integrate them into the great calling of raising boys. I'm wonderfully blessed with a creative visual-spatial learner and a vibrant verbal-linguistic learner. Yes, we build and chat and build and chat and build and chat. In his book 5 Minds for the Future: Cultivating Thinking Skills , Gardner reflects on our new society: “…We must immediately expand our vision beyond standard educational institutions. In our cultures of