The M&M Story

S: B, what do you want for your birthday? B: A real pig. S: (Gulp) Where would we go find a real pig? B: A farm. S: Where would we keep the pig? B: Outside. He's got it all figured out.

As I've walked into spring, I am more and more convicted of how selfish I really am. And how much I want to sculpt my life into the sculpture of my own choosing and my own design rather than my Father's. I often find myself behind the potter's wheel, trying to mold and shape my plans and desires and wants, but it usually ends up nothing but a clump of clay. This past Sunday I sat in a very crowded Easter service at my church. I enjoyed seeing friends and hearing the message, but I was most moved by a simple gesture that I witnessed. A friend I have known and admired for years was in town visiting his family for the holiday. At some point in the service, the pastor instructed us to greet one another, and as I stood behind my friend, I saw him stand and look around at all the people who didn't have seats. He picked up his chair and walked to the back of the auditorium and gave his chair to a young mother and her baby who had been standing in the back. I thought ab...

M turned five this week. It's hard to fathom that five years ago I gave birth to my first child (all 9lbs 5oz of him), and now he is learning to read. I remember the day he was born. We went to our early morning doctor's appointment, and Dr. Krasnoff casually asked us, "So, do you want to have a baby today?" We went to WCA (fulfilling our roles as the controlling, overachieving, firstborn children) to get things organized because we had not planned on having M nine days early. Brian got out his Mini-Maynor list and started making calls. Friends and family showed up at some point in the day and by 5:30 p.m., I was holding my baby boy. Lots and lots of friends came to visit during our two day stay at Missouri Baptist and many posed shots of friends and family looking at sleeping baby M were taken. There were funny moments when Uncle Peter and Daddy tried to change a diaper and pee pee went everywhere. There were tender moments when all three of us cuddled on th...

C.S. Lewis was right when he described the spiral effect of grief. It's like that ride at Six Flags where you spin and the bottom drops and you find your body pressed against some nasty carpet wall. You focus on not vomiting on all the people around you, and you put on a brave smile because you don't want anyone to know that you really are sick and scared and crazy for being on this ride in the first place. But then you hear a noise and the machine begins to slow just a bit. The bottom begins to move and you suddenly feel your feet touch the floor and you peel yourself off the carpet wall. You focus on trying not to be sick and you breathe deeply. The spinning stops and you get off, a little dizzy, but okay. Then it's time to walk around and get a frozen lemonade and maybe hit a couple other rides. But before you know it, you are standing in line to spin once again. Only this time, you know what to expect and you take a Tums or you focus on a spot or you put on tho...

Beginning this week Briggs will join his cousin Lillian's class on Mondays and Fridays for the rest of the school year. God, once again, has given me a calling filled with kingdom purposes, one in which I thought I was successfully ignoring until He gently twisted my arm and said, "You will do this." But that's for another post. When I asked Briggs if he would like to be in Lillian's class, he very seriously asked, "Will I be four? Or is Lillian going to be three?" I tried hard not to laugh out loud.

As B and M were snuggled up next to me during before bed book time, I leaned over to B and whispered in his ear, "You're my favorite Briggs." He then leaned over and whispered back, "You're my favorite mommy." His tender heart (and sassy personality) continually bless me.

I stole these pics from my sister-in-law. We went bowling with M's school, and it was a blast. M. was totally into it. B loved it, too.